How To Deal With Sibling Rivalry

I saw this article and wanted to share it. I personally have been dealing with this issue a lot with my 7 and 4 year olds. 
 


by: Amy Twain

Sibling rivalry is almost common to parents with more than one child. Not only exclusive to young children, sibling rivalry even extends even to children's adulthood.

For the parents, if you hear the fighting and bickering happening, let each child ask what their problem is, and ask each of them to figure out some ideas which can help solve their problem. Give them a chance to share their own ideas on their own. If ever they can't find solutions on their own, offer some of your own which might work. Everyone must agree with the given solution and stick to it--so that there would be change.

If this set up is already being constantly practiced and complied, then it's time the parents should stay out of it. If children come to you to gossip/report about the other, answer them nicely that it's no longer your problem and you believed that they could both generate some solutions to their problems like before.

Even you can obviously tell one child is wrong, try and have that child recognize that for himself; try your best not to take sides with either of them. Sibling rivalry usually happens when the parents do not play fair and seem to pick favorites. Also, taking sides only teaches the child to evade their own problem solving skills when they see that someone older is sticking up for them. 

Nevertheless, during those happy times when they play harmoniously together, compliment and praise them for getting along so well. And how about those times when they get to solve problems on their own? Be sure to remind them that you're always proud of them.

Model your behavior as you'd like your kids to emulate you. When you're in a dispute with someone, take note and be careful if your kids are there for they're learning how you deal with the situation.

About The Author

The author of this article, Amy Twain, is a Self Improvement Coach who has been successfully coaching and guiding clients for many years. Amy recently published a new home study course on how to boost your Self Esteem. Click here to get more info about her Quick-Action Plan for A More Confident You.




STOP SIBLINGS FROM FIGHTING.

Stranger Danger

Recently we had an attempted child abduction. Our town has been on alert again since the kidnapping of Jaycee Dugard. She was kidnapped here in our town. It is odd that since she was found people are being extra careful as if they should not have been being careful for the past 18 years. But two weeks ago a ten year boy was almost kidnapped by a man driving a white truck. He jumped out and try to grab the boy. He road his bike away very fast and got away from the stranger. My kids have been having stranger danger classes in school and learning about self defense. I think it is great that the schools teach this. But I also think that it needs to be taught at home. (Same with sex education) Parents need to talk to there children about being safe and what the family plan is at all times. Here is a nice article just going over the basics by a man named Frank Skellington.

STOPPING CHILD ABDUCTIONS Stopping child abductions is something every parent takes interest in. This article has been written to share seven things you can do to help reduce your risk. They're simple things people don't think about sometimes.

Do you have a lawn or gardening service? Some sort of yard service? After workers leave for the day check all openings to the home. Windows, doors maybe even dog doors when you go to bed.

If you are parents, or a parent who works late have a code word. A word your children and you know in case someone else has to pick them up. Make sure they know, unless someone uses the code word not to leave with them.

You don't want to put your children's names on their clothes. As much as it burns to lose a jacket, it's always worse to lose your child. Jackets will always cost less.

Often if a child screams as loud as they can abductors will flee. Teach your child if anyone tries to grab them scream "KIDNAPPER" or "FIRE" as they are always sure to get attention.

This one can never be shared enough. Know their friends. Know their hangouts. Try and know or even coordinate with parents of your childs friends.

Try and have an after school program with other parents in the neighborhood. Maybe a safe house the children can go to after school. Maybe offer to provide snacks and drinks. Or maybe a movie.

Find out about the security program in place at the school or daycare your child attends. Make sure you are familiar with the outlines. If you see something you think can be better, speak up! Parent's input is usually appreciated if it's constructive. So there ya have it. Seven simple tips you can start practicing today. Sometimes the simplest measures have the biggest impact.

I also think it is very important to teach your kids about people they do know. That they should never go into a neighbors house without permission. Never go with a grown up that they know unless they were told that it is okay. Using the code word as suggested in the article. As we have seen on the news it is not always strangers we need to be cautious of.

PARENTING POTENTIALS - NEED EXTRA HELP WITH PARENTING

Parenting - Daily Struggle

I struggle daily on whether or not I am being a good parent and whether or not I am raising my children to be strong individuals. It is so hard to stay in control when your children are challenging your sanity. I am listening to an audio series called Scream Free Parenting by Hal Runkel, LMFT. It teaches you to begin with your self and get yourself in the right place. If you have issues handle them first before handling the behavior issues you wish to address with your child. I have trouble with this because I feel like I am being selfish if I take time to be by myself or do things for myself. I believe a lot of moms feel this way. We feel like if we are not always there for our families then we are not doing our job.

I often find myself trying to keep my cool and not lash out on my kids. Especially at night. We have a nightly routine. We get in jammies, we brush our teeth, we have mellow time for a little while, then we read books and then it is bedtime. Bedtime is a horrible experience every night. My kids cry and say they don't love me and I am so mean to them and I do not let them do anything. They'll say things like I do not love them and stuff and then it is crying for quite along time. Mainly my six year old. My three year old it is only for a few minutes and then he stays in his bed. But my six year old she will throw things,cry really loud and hurt herself. I feel bad for my son because he has to listen to her. Last night I let him sleep on the couch and that made her even more mad.

When they are saying these things and throwing fits. I just want to freak out on them right back. It is really hard to walk away from them. I have found myself saying You think I do not do anything for you? I can show you how I do not do anything for you? Or I can show you how I do not allow you to do anything?

I do not believe that is helpful but sometimes it is really hard to control your emotions and reactions.

I get scared sometimes that I am about to have three soon. My husband and I work opposite shifts so he is not home at night , 6 nights a week. So I feel like I am going to have it in for me soon when I have three crying at bedtime.

I know this is not much of an advice post but maybe more of a venting post.

The Beginning

I am a mother of a six year old girl and a three year old boy and I am seven months pregnant. As any mother can relate. Parenting is not always bliss. There are constant struggles with daily life. I work a full time job and go to school. My husband and I work separate shifts so we rarely see each other. I feel like a single mom much of the time. My kids can drive me crazy one minute and the next be the sweetest things on earth. I wouldn't change my life for anything.
I wanted to start this blog to help me write about my days and get some frusterations out. Maybe some of you can relate. I would love feedback and advice from anybody. I also hope to get articles and products on here that will help other parents with their daily struggles, concerns and so on.